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0:00There is a lot of judgement online about how people choose to work, what fuels them, which fundamentally is it reward or punishment? Are they Are they going away from an aversive stimulus or towards, you know, a positive one? The answer, in my opinion, doesn't matter. And what I mean by that is I think the first rule of all entrepreneurship is use what you have.

0:26Because that's not going to change. Today, you have what you have. Those are the only resources you have available to you. You must become more resourceful. And that means that if you have shame and people tell you shame is bad, in what world could shame be good? If the shame you have creates this amazingly positive thing in your life, was it bad? If your dad not hugging you enough created the catalyst for you to go to the gym and live 20 years longer because you work out regularly, was it bad? Do we need to label it at all?

0:58All we know is that it happened. And so what? There are these actions that increase the likelihood that you get what you want. Whether you do them because you had some negative thing or because you're going towards some positive thing, I think for the vast majority of people is narrative. They only They create the story. If I said, "Hey, why did you do this thing?" We are trained to give an answer. But that answer may have zero grounding in the truth. Not because you lied, but because you have no idea. Cuz most people don't know why they do what they do. They just do it and then they ascribe a reason afterwards. We know that it's mostly BS and you're not going to have a double-blind controlled placebo study on your life to be able to determine what the true root cause of Was this the dependent variable? If you're not going to be able to do that anyways, who cares? Use whatever you've got to get whatever you want. Give you a behavioral, you know, thing for this.

1:48It's like you might be going through something difficult or a hard season or a bad day or a bad moment, right? And I've heard the saying and it drives me absolutely bananas, which is that bad things come in threes. Anyone heard this before? Right? I so wholeheartedly disagree, but I will explain why I believe that saying is a saying. Bad things do not come in threes. Bad things occur. People do not know how to cope. They allow one bad thing to snowball into more bad things. And bad stuff sucks. And the only thing worse than willing one bad thing be a bad thing is to let one bad thing ruin many good things. If you think about a bad thing as a cancer, it's like well we want to isolate that cancer as fast as possible and not let that cancer of you losing your job affect your marriage. And then let you affecting your marriage affect how you're you know a parent. And let you know how you're a parent affect how you are going to pursue this new endeavor.

2:33People just basically give themselves an excuse for misbehaving. I had a bad day, therefore I now have a legitimate excuse for being a bad husband or not being nice to my wife. They use it as an excuse to not exercise self-control. And that is when things snowball. This is why resilience is so important. Can something bad happen and I recover before I talk to somebody else? When things get bad, it looks like this. Something bad happens, something else bad happens, something else bad happens, and it keeps going down.

3:03Until eventually everyone in your life that is good has removed themselves and then you slowly recover. Or you don't recover at all. And you've seen these people. He lost his job, he gained weight, and man he's just never been the same. Pull your head out of your ass.