Was mentale Stärke wirklich ausmacht

0:00So how does this ideal person behave when something bad happens? They have huge tolerance. So almost nothing bothers them, right? High tolerance, super long fuse. If something does bother them, then their behavior change is so small, it's imperceptible, it's unnoticeable. No one can even notice that they're acting any different. And then they recover immediately because they have high they have high resilience. So even that that tiny imperceptible change and then boom they're back within a second they came back high resilience and then not only that they use that experience that bad thing to get better so they have high adaptability and so the end result of that is someone who just keeps getting better. They just keep getting stronger. They just keep improving and life happens for them not to them.

0:55real and the real world result of this that it takes very little to throw them off their game. A tiny on the on the other hand, if somebody has let's let's imagine an imperfect person. All right, let's somebody who's zero out of 10 mental toughness. They're a mental a mental weenie. They're a little ninny. All right, some of you know these people as well. Some of you may be these people.

1:19All right. And so for you, it may take almost nothing to throw you off your game. Maybe it's bad weather. Maybe you got you a little bit little bit of traffic. Maybe the Wi-Fi is slow today, right? Maybe someone wrote a mean comment or maybe your your your post didn't get as many likes as you want, right? Somebody didn't buy and you thought they should have, right? Someone someone just calls you a bad name, right? They say, "You live your life in a way that I would not prefer." And you say, "Oh gosh, gee whiz, what will I do now?" Right? And so it takes very little to throw you off your game. A tiny inconvenience sends you spiraling.

1:52Low tolerance. Think weenie tolerance. Itty bitty bitty bitty tolerance. All right. Now, the next element of this mental weenie is that not only does it take almost nothing to throw them off their game, they drastically change their behavior. All right. They go super deep, they massively change how they behave as a result of this tiny little thing. Right? Again, we're thinking about a weenie here.

2:18I probably should stop saying that ninny. We'll keep with ninny. All right. And then, and here's where it gets nasty. This is the third point of their mental nittiness. All right. Is that once they've massively changed their behavior, they stay down for a long time. And this is what that would look like. It takes them a super long time to restabilize their their behavior. Like that tiny little Wi-Fi being so that tiny little comment that someone said forever. They just it just keeps bothering them. Keeps bothering. keep replaying in their head. They said this thing at this party and they think people laughed at them and they just keep replaying it, right?

2:54And not only that, when they finally stabilize, this is the fourth element, right? When they finally stabilize at this new lower baseline, they now are permanently worse as a result. So almost nothing threw them off. As soon as they do get thrown off, it's super deep in terms of their change in behavior. It takes them forever to recover. And then by the time they do recover, their recovery is worse than they were before. And you have met these people. I have met these people. This is the person who gets broken up with, gains 50 pounds, loses their job, and gets addicted to drugs.

3:28And key point, never recovers. And so life occurs and they simply get worse over and over and over again. Every time something happens, they spin out. They change their behavior, and then they're permanently worse. They're less likely to achieve the goals they have in their life, whatever those goals are. Life happens to them, not for them.

3:54And so, of course, people in the real world like you and me, right, we sit somewhere between these two extremes, between maxed out stats and ninism. And so, you might have someone, for example, with a long fuse, right? But when they snap, they really snap. So this is someone who has high mental tolerance but low fortitude. And so and if they were to stay upset for weeks, then they would have low resiliency, but maybe they come back to baseline again. And that way, if they had come back to baseline, they have medium adaptability. So you've got someone with high tolerance, low fortitude, uh I don't remember if I said they they they take they come back quickly or not.

4:35Um and then medium adaptability, right? So, as we're thinking about this, like think about how you'd relate yourself to each of these four, right? Now, let's give a different example. Let's say someone um you know gets upset really fast, right? It doesn't dig a lot. So, they have low tolerance. Uh they have uh but so imagine somebody who gets upset really quickly but like barely changes their behavior. Okay? You know, some of these people too like some you know they're they're sensitive but like they're they're back, right? They they bounce back pretty quick, right?

5:06So [clears throat] they would have high fortitude and high resilience. So it doesn't change their behavior much and they and they recover really quickly. Okay, doable. And they have normal adaptability. So you know these people, right? So it it doesn't take much to set them off, but they only change behavior a little bit and they recover really quickly and then they go back to normal, right? Well, when you think about that, that's a different kind of mental toughness um makeup than the first example.

5:33No, Richard. Trauma is not more complex. People try to confuse each other and listen to other people who confuse them. Trauma is a permanent change of behavior from an aversive stimulus. Something bad happens in your life and you permanently change the way you behave. Period. Period. Period. I don't know what to tell you, bro. I like I really want to help and that's why I'm saying this. Like people like people who believe that allow trauma to permanently change their behavior in a negative way and they get worse from it.

6:06And God, I hope that no one has traumatic things in their life. I hope that nothing bad happens to you. But it is a fact of life that bad things will occur. And so the question is how you behave as a result. Real. I want to help. I really do. This is why I'm making this stuff for you guys. All right. So, …